I let my wife borrow the BMW

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I let my wife borrow the BMW today…

I told her to be careful, there’s plenty of idiots on the road. Sure enough about 15 minutes later on the radio; I hear that there’s a car driving on the wrong side of the road in my area. I gave her a call: Be careful love, someone’s driving on the wrong side of the road.

Wife: Someone is…? EVERYONE IS! ================================

After a meeting several days ago, I couldn’t find my keys.

I quickly gave myself a personal “TSA Pat Down.”

They weren’t in my pockets. Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot.

My husband has scolded me many times for leaving my keys in the car’s ignition. He’s afraid that the car could be stolen. As I looked around the parking lot, I realized he was right.

The parking lot was empty. I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen.

Then I made the most difficult call of all to my husband: “I left my keys in the car and it’s been stolen.”

There was a moment of silence. I thought the call had been disconnected, but then I heard his voice. “Are you kidding me?” he barked, “I dropped you off!”

Now it was my turn to be silent.

Embarrassed, I said, “Well, can you come and get me?”

He retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this cop that I didn’t steal your car!”

Welcome to the golden years…

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A husband went to the sheriff’s department to report that his wife was missing. Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home.

What happened next changed everything… FULL STORY on the next page.
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