Then we’d load his old fishing rods into our station wagon and drive to a lake about forty minutes away.
There was a marina there with actual fishing boats lined up at the docks.
We never used them.
Dad and I would walk past the marina and follow a dirt path until we reached a spot along the bank beneath two huge oak trees.
We never used them.
That was our place.
He’d unfold two battered lawn chairs, hand me a rod, and say, “All right. Let’s see if you’ve improved since last week.”
“I caught more than you last week.”
“You caught a branch.”
“All right. Let’s see if you’ve improved since last week.”
“It was heavy.”
“Strong branch.”
I loved those mornings — the cold air, the mist over the water, sandwiches at seven because Dad said fishing had different meal rules.
Sometimes he’d point toward the far side of the lake.
I loved those mornings
“That’s where the good fishing is,” he’d say. “Out past the northern point.”
“Can we go?”
“You need a boat.”
“So let’s get one.”
He’d laugh. “Good plan. You buying?”
I didn’t understand the joke then.
“That’s where the good fishing is,” he’d say. “Out past the northern point.”
Eventually I did.
***
More than thirty years passed.
Dad retired, I built a life of my own, and somehow I became the age he’d been in most of my childhood memories.
We still saw each other regularly, but we hadn’t gone fishing together in years.
Then, about two months ago, I found something online that brought those mornings rushing back.
Somehow I became the age he’d been in most of my childhood memories.
It wasn’t cheap.
In fact, it probably cost more than Dad had spent on all our childhood fishing trips combined.
I booked it anyway.
Then I called him.
“Keep Saturday free.”
“Why?”
I booked it anyway.
“I’m taking you fishing.”
Another pause, but this one felt different.
“Fishing?”
“Yeah.”
He laughed softly. “Like old times?”
“Exactly.”
“I’m taking you fishing.”
He sounded younger when he said, “All right. I’ll find my hat.”
***
Saturday morning, I picked him up before sunrise.
Sure enough, he came outside wearing the same ugly green fishing hat he’d owned since I was a kid.
I stared at it.
“How is that thing still alive?”
Saturday morning, I picked him up before sunrise.
Dad climbed into the passenger seat. “Quality workmanship. They don’t make things like they used to.”
“It has three holes in it.”
“Ventilation.”
“It smells like a garage.”
“Character.”
Then he slapped my dashboard.
Dad climbed into the passenger seat.
“Let’s go.”
For most of the drive, he told stories I’d heard a hundred times.
The time I dropped his tackle box in the lake.
The morning I insisted a turtle was stalking us.
“It was following me.”
“It was sitting on a log.”
For most of the drive, he told stories I’d heard a hundred times.
“For twenty minutes.”
“Turtles are patient.”
Dad laughed so hard he started coughing.
I remember looking over at him under the passing streetlights and realizing how much older he’d gotten.
His hands looked thinner.
Dad laughed so hard he started coughing.
His shoulders had curved slightly.
For some reason, I felt a pressure in my chest.
I wanted the day to be perfect.
I wanted to give something back.
When I turned into the marina parking lot, Dad’s smile faded.
He looked out the windshield.
I wanted the day to be perfect.
“This isn’t where we parked.”
“I know.”
“Our spot is around the other side.”
“I know.”
He looked at me.
“What are you doing?”
“This isn’t where we parked.”
“Just come on.”
He narrowed his eyes.
“What did you do?”
“Dad, would you stop?”
“No.”
“It’s a surprise, okay?” I got out.
“Dad, would you stop?”
He followed me, muttering something I couldn’t hear.
The docks were quiet in the early morning. The sky had started turning pale blue over the lake.
A man in his late fifties stood beside a white fishing boat, checking equipment.
“Daniel?” he called.
“That’s me.”
He followed me, muttering something I couldn’t hear.
He smiled and walked over.
“I’m Rick.”
We shook hands.
Then Rick looked at my father.
His eyes moved to Dad’s battered green fishing hat.
For a second, his expression changed.
Then Rick looked at my father.
“Sir,” he said slowly. “Have you been coming to this lake a long time?”
Dad glanced at him. “Used to. Long time ago.”
Rick kept staring at the hat.
Then at Dad.
Dad didn’t seem to notice. He’d turned toward the boat.
Rick kept staring at the hat.
Rick caught my eye.
“Excuse me a second.”
He pulled me a few steps away and lowered his voice.
“He really doesn’t know?”
I grinned.
“He really doesn’t know?”
“No.”
Rick glanced back at Dad.
“Wow.”
“I’ve been keeping it from him for weeks.”
Rick looked at me strangely.
“I’ve been keeping it from him for weeks.”
“Keeping what from him?”
“The charter,” I said. “He thinks we’re just going fishing like we used to.”
Rick’s face relaxed slightly.
“Oh.”
“What did you mean?”
“Nothing.”
“He thinks we’re just going fishing like we used to.”
“That didn’t sound like nothing.”
He looked past me at Dad.
“What’s his name?”
I told him.
Rick went very still.
Then he gave me a strange little smile.
“That didn’t sound like nothing.”
“You booked the north point?”
“Full day.”
“And he doesn’t know?”
“No. He used to talk about it when I was a kid. I wanted to finally take him somewhere he could never afford back then.”
Then he gave me a strange little smile.
Rick looked toward Dad again.
“Right,” he said quietly. “Let’s see what he says.”
I should have asked what that meant.
We started loading our gear.
Dad barely spoke.
“Let’s see what he says.”
At first I thought he was overwhelmed.
Then I noticed he wasn’t looking at the boat.
He was looking toward the far end of the marina, where an old dirt trail disappeared between the trees.
“Dad?”
“Hm?”
Dad barely spoke.
“You okay?”
“Yeah.”
“You don’t look excited.”
“I’m excited.”
“You look like you’re waiting for dental work.”
He gave me a tired smile.
“You don’t look excited.”
Rick untied one of the ropes.
Then Dad said, “Can I ask you something?”
Rick stopped.
“Sure.”
“Could we go somewhere else?”
“Can I ask you something?”
I stared at him.
“What?”
“I know you planned all this,” Dad said. “And I appreciate it.”
“Then what’s wrong?”
He looked past the boat toward the dirt trail.
“Could we go somewhere else?”
“I’d rather go to our old spot.”
“The bank?”
He nodded.
“Dad, this is the north point. You talked about fishing out there my entire childhood.”
That finally got a laugh out of him.
“I’d rather go to our old spot.”
“I really oversold that story.”
“What are you talking about?”
His smile disappeared.
“I don’t think I ever said I wanted to fish there.”
I stared at him. I’d planned this trip so I could finally fulfill my dad’s dream of fishing at the north point, and now he was saying that wasn’t what he wanted at all.
I didn’t understand.
“What are you talking about?”
“You talked about it constantly.”
“When you were eight.”
“Exactly.”
Dad looked toward the trail again.
Then he sat on the wooden bench beside the dock.
“Come here. There’s something I need to explain to you.”
“You talked about it constantly.”
I sat beside him.
Rick stayed near the boat, pretending to check something.
Dad stared at the water.
“You remember asking me why we never took one of these boats?”
“Sure.”
“Come here. There’s something I need to explain to you.”
“You were probably seven. You asked me three times one morning.”
“Sounds like me.”
Dad smiled, but it didn’t last.
“Afterward, while you were messing around near the water, I came over here and asked the man running the marina what a half-day boat rental cost.”
“Sounds like me.”
He rubbed his palms together.
“I knew before he finished talking that I couldn’t afford it.”
Something tightened in my stomach.
“I told him it was for my boy. Told him you saw all these boats and probably thought your dad was choosing not to take you.”
“Dad—”
“I knew before he finished talking that I couldn’t afford it.”
“Let me finish. He didn’t give me money. Didn’t offer me a discount. I’m glad he didn’t.”
Dad pointed toward the trail.
“He showed me that spot under the oak trees. Told me what bait to use and when the fish came close to shore.”
Then Dad smiled.
Dad pointed toward the trail.
“And he told me, ‘Your boy’s not going to remember whether you had a boat. He’s going to remember that you got up before sunrise to spend the morning with him.’”
Behind us, Rick stopped moving.
Dad hadn’t noticed.
I had.
‘Your boy’s not going to remember whether you had a boat.’
“And you believed him?”
Dad laughed once.
“Not at first.” He looked down at his hands. “For years, I still wished I could give you more. You’d talk about some kid going to Disney World or getting a new bike, and I’d feel about two inches tall.”
“We were fine.”
“I know that now.”
“Not at first.”
He smiled at me.
“Because every morning I’d wake you up to go fishing, half the time you were waiting by the door before I finished making the sandwiches.”
“You took forever.”
“Precise peanut-butter ratios.”
I laughed.
“I know that now.”
Dad’s eyes filled.
“You talked the whole drive. Fish, school, dinosaurs, girls, God. Whatever was in your head.”
“That sounds exhausting.”
“It was.” He smiled. “I loved it.”
Then he looked toward the old trail.
“It was.” He smiled. “I loved it.”
“Eventually I realized that man was right. I wasn’t failing to give you something better.” Dad looked at me. “I already had exactly what I wanted.”
Behind us, Rick said quietly, “His name was Walter.”
Dad turned.
“What did you say?”
Rick had come closer.
“Eventually I realized that man was right.”
“The man who told you that,” he said. “His name was Walter.”
Dad stared at him.
Rick swallowed.
“He was my father.”
For a second, Dad didn’t move. Then his eyes narrowed.
“He was my father.”
“You’re that Rick?”
Rick smiled.
“You remember me?”
“You used to sweep the docks.”
“Among other glamorous duties.”
Dad looked from Rick to the marina office and back again.
“You remember me?”
“My God.”
They shook hands, but then Rick pulled Dad into a hug.
When they stepped apart, Rick looked at Dad.
“My father remembered you. All his life.”
Dad blinked.
“My father remembered you. All his life.”
“What?”
“He talked about you years later.”
“Why?”
Rick smiled.
“He saw plenty of fathers come through here with expensive boats and expensive gear. Some barely spoke to their kids.”
“He talked about you years later.”
Dad looked down.
“But he remembered the maintenance guy who couldn’t afford a boat and kept showing up before sunrise with his boy anyway.”
Dad shook his head.
“I was just trying.”
“Some barely spoke to their kids.”
“I know,” Rick said. “That’s what he admired.”
Dad didn’t answer.
For the first time that morning, he looked like he had no joke ready.
Neither did I.
I looked at the white fishing boat.
“That’s what he admired.”
Then at Dad.
Then at the dirt trail disappearing between the trees.
“Rick?”
“Yeah?”
“Can we cancel the charter?”
He had no joke ready.
Dad frowned.
“You paid for it.”
“I don’t care.”
“You should.”
I looked at him.
“Do you still have those lawn chairs?”
“Can we cancel the charter?”
His mouth twitched.
“They’re in my garage.”
“Of course they are.”
“Good chairs.”
“They’re older than I am.”
“That just proves how good they are.”
“They’re older than I am.”
Rick laughed.
“I’ll take care of the charter,” he said.
Then he disappeared into the marina office and returned with a small paper bag.
“What’s this?” Dad asked.
“Bait.”
Dad looked inside.
Then he disappeared into the marina office and returned with a small paper bag.
His eyebrows went up.
“The same kind?”
“My dad’s recommendation hasn’t changed.”
So we drove back to Dad’s house.
We got the chairs.
Then we returned to the lake and walked the old trail.
“My dad’s recommendation hasn’t changed.”
The trees had grown thicker. The path was narrower than I remembered.
But the oak trees were still there.
So was our spot.
Dad unfolded the chairs.
I unpacked the sandwiches I’d brought.
The path was narrower than I remembered.
Turkey and cheese this time.
He looked offended.
“What happened to peanut butter?”
“I upgraded.”
“Nobody asked you to.”
We cast our lines.
He looked offended.
For a while, neither of us said much.
The sun rose higher over the water.
Birds moved through the reeds.
Somewhere behind us, a boat engine started.
Dad glanced toward the sound, then back at his line.
For a while, neither of us said much.
A few minutes later, Dad’s line jerked.
He sat up. “Oh.”
“What?”
“I’ve got something.”
“Probably a branch.”
“I’ve got something.”
“Shut up.”
He started reeling.
I stood beside him, laughing while he complained about my lack of support.
The fish wasn’t impressive.
Maybe ten inches.
Dad held it up like he’d won a tournament.
Dad glanced toward the sound, then back at his line.
“Look at that.”
“It’s tiny.”
“It’s respectable.”
“It’s embarrassed to be seen with you.”
He looked at the fish.
“Don’t listen to him.”
“It’s embarrassed to be seen with you.”
Then he released it back into the lake.
We sat down again.
I handed him a sandwich.
He took one bite and shook his head.
“Peanut butter would’ve been better.”
“Next time.”
We sat down again.
He looked at me.
“Next time?”
“Yeah.”
Dad nodded.
“All right.”
“Next time.”
We sat there in those two old chairs, eating sandwiches beside the same patch of water.
The boat I’d paid for was still back at the marina.
I didn’t miss it.
Walter had been right all those years ago, and he was still right now.
We didn’t need a boat or an amazing fishing spot. All we needed was each other.
Walter had been right all those years ago, and he was still right now.
